Ignorance doesn’t mean stupid. It is lacking knowledge regarding a topic(s). Most of my ignorance has come from sloth or procrastination. Either I have been too lazy to read up on a topic or knowing that doing so can be tedious, having to read pros and cons about the subject.
I once believed everything the nightly news said. The networks competed to find the most convincing individuals as anchors, and they were successful. I discovered the more I watched and believed news morning, noon, and night, I became lazier and stopped reading, or quit stopping by the library to research, and to look up info about something I heard on the news about that did not sound right.
What I discovered was shocking. To think that my favorite anchors were not telling the truth? Though bliss I experienced from trusting the news kept me ignorant, I discovered TV talk shows, sitcoms, dramas, even kids shows were pressing an agenda! The agenda? “What could it be, I thought?” (That discovery was in the 1980’s).
The agenda is what we all see playing out today. It is a tragedy to watch socialism crawl into any nation, but I cannot believe the USA has over half of it’s citizen’s ignorantly falling prey to a system that has never worked and never will. How can we not see Venezuela’s march from being prosperous into total ruin over the past decade?
I won’t go on, but I will fight this out. God has the final say about the election, and I plan to return to posting if possible. I hope to continue posting about addictions, but I can see how this evil agenda has fueled drug and alcohol addiction, and what they hoped to gain from doing so. Stay tuned.
prayer
Get In, Get Out, or Take a Seat
So I sidelined myself for a bit. I had good reasons. After all I am a busy man and I don’t believe what I write has had much, if any effect on others. Am I whining? Yep, a regular cry baby. Seriously, I have felt this inward tug to get back at it on a regular basis in hope of winning some to the Kingdom of Christ, or helping some find sobriety, both through these simple writings.
It really comes down to this. I watched the movie Tombstone several times. I am a dialog guy and a guy that likes to see good win out over evil. Are you like that? The OK Corral scene, Wyatt Earp dodging bullets yells at the cowardly Ike Stanton and blares, “GET IN THE FIGHT OR GET OUT OF THE WAY! I remembered this scene and now see my own cowardice in not getting in this war we are fighting much sooner. I hate to offend after all. You may be unaware we are fighting, or there is even a war in the first place. Here’s the field of battle:
“For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against the spiritual host of wickedness in the heavenly places….Eph. 6:12
It’s brutal out there as some of you know from what is going on with the mud pie fights the dems and reps are having, while issues go ignored, i.e. healthcare, the infrastructure, addicts found dead daily. Don’t choose to hate either side, but pray for them with sincerity. Or refuse to pray for them from your intense hatred of them. I’d bet you probably didn’t vote anyway, now you can hate me too…have a seat please.
Others say, you’re nuts! You honestly believe there are forces controlling events? It’s that lying President, or it’s those liberal lefties. Whatever, take a seat next to the intense haters, I ‘ll get with you later. And keep your hands to yourself.
Now those ready to do battle, gird your loins. Don’t hold on to any grudges of any kind. Pray for opposition you face in life. 1 Tim 2:1-2 gives you an idea of who we should pray for, and we already know to pray for our personal needs and the innumerable requests on social media. Speaking of media, man, do they need prayer. They have more to do with our national division that any political branch. Anyhow lets fight this spiritual warfare boldly, in confidence and knowing the time is short. Thanks!
Letting Go
A woman’s son had taken her to the point of bankruptcy with his constant drug use, legal troubles from arrests, and not working. When he was jailed she made sure he had money on his book for food and necessities. She ignored what she was told about enabling her son’s bad behavior. “I love my son, I just can’t let him go hungry, be homeless, what kind of a parent would I be?”
She finally had to surrender and told her son he was not welcome back home until he had a job and was clean and sober. She made this hard decision knowing she may never see her son again, he may die alone, freeze to death, or even starve! But she would lose her home if he stayed and continued doing nothing other than sponging off of her. She feared finding him dead in their home.
For five years she never heard from Him. She was heart-broken, fearing the worst but continued to pray to God in hope for his safety and recovery.
Then one day her son walked in the door, clean and sober, had his own place to live and a job! He had also found Christ and was in the ministry!
She had finally let go and let God. There is hope when we make the decision to trust Him. Luther said, “I’ve held many things in my hands and lost them all. But those things I placed in God’s hands I still have.”
I hope this little true story helps parents who don’t know how to let go. I certainly know it is hard. Pray, give the care of your child into His hands, or as one man said, “Pray and let God worry.”
The Gateway
The mountain of hurts experienced from others throughout your lifetime has likely left you with some deep scars. Some are quick to say they not holding a grudge or resentments from abuse or being mistreated by others. Their words, however, are proof they are still nursing the wounds, even to the extreme, medicating the pain. Like one lady said regarding a friend who hurt her deeply;
“Oh yes, I forgave her alright, but let me tell you what that old devil did to me!”
What about the mountain of hurt you may have inflicted on others? It is, to me, more painful knowing I hurt or let others down. Now I have to ask their forgiveness, but also I have to forgive myself. That is much more difficult to do. I mean, I have to forgive myself or live with regrets rueing over my bad behaviors until remorse sets up fortress inside my heart. And it can, and does. At one time I didn’t care, let em’ think what they think of me, it’s their problem. I was very sick back then.
“To err is human, to forgive divine.” Alexander Pope
“Forgive, and you will be forgiven.” Jesus
I believe the gateway to forgiveness is gratitude. I have discovered from my alcoholic past that being grateful for sobriety opened my spiritual eyes to see my fallen nature ruled me, thinking I was entitled to having everything, including my own way. When I didn’t get what I wanted, I became ungrateful for what I did have. I became envious of others success. I became angry at my job for not getting a promotion, and jealous even at my church for their blindness to my hard work for God… (oh what a baby). My solution, the bar stool and ears to agree with my whining.
“I would maintain that thanks are the highest form of thought; that gratitude is happiness doubled by wonder.” G.K. Chesterton
“When I started counting my blessings my whole life turned around.” Willie Nelson
When grateful, color seems to enter the world, sounds are heard, handshakes and embraces are sincere, suddenly purpose comes into play, and empathy becomes the heart mate of hope and love. Seeing those who hurt me, including myself in the mirror, as broken by life, poor upbringing, etc., with an understanding that only God’s Spirit within could give me. I also feel pressed to ask forgiveness to those I hurt. I am truly thankful for my awakening to the gateway of gratitude.
Well, tomorrow is Thanksgiving Day. I hope you can take the time to be grateful for what you have. A life of gratitude is the gateway to forgiveness, and the mother of all virtue.
Disregarded Help
I don’t know the number of times I made snap decisions over important matters in life. The number heavily outweighs how often I sought counsel from others, or more importantly, inquired of the Lord for direction. I am asked by some I work with in recovery, “what is your favorite verse in the Bible?” I have several verses that I may quote, but one stands out to me most often is Psalm 119:130:
The entrance of Your word gives light, it gives understanding to the simple.
This being a favorite causes me to ask myself, “why don’t you try referring to this verse when you make decisions?” This verse doesn’t help me make a right decision within itself. I makes me aware to seek the scriptures for counsel, where I find help and great advice for any situation in life, like:
Where there is no counsel the people fall; but in the multitude of counselors there is safety. Pr.11:14
Whoever loves instruction loves knowledge, but he who hates instruction is stupid. Pr.12:1
What I see from these verses and scores of others is, get instruction, take advice, don’t be wise in your own eyes, pray and wait on the answer! Do I like pain? I must because I do not ask advice often, people may think I’m spiritually stupid after all. Well, why don’t I pray? Because God will make me wait and I don’t want to wait, I want the answer now so I will make the choice and God will bless it because He loves me, I’m His child. Wrong!
You know the old hymn’s words:
Oh what peace we often forfeit, oh what needless pain we bear. All because we do not carry everything to God in prayer. (What a friend we have in Jesus).
I want to do what I counsel others to do, inquire of the Lord on every decision, look to the scripture, get wisdom from others by asking for help. It is true God loves me, I’m His kid. His love allows me to face the consequences of bad decisions, even though He could fix my goof-ups. Pain from those bad choices causes me to not do that again, I can see to repent, go the other direction, toward His counsel.
God doesn’t enable my bad behaviors. He isn’t a celestial Santa either, giving me my wants. My needs, however, He supplies to His glory and my good. I need humility and patience.
Thanks, I hope you can identify. Blessings to you all.
Dear Younger Me
I wanted to share this short poem written by a man I met recently. He is one of the fortunate ones, still alive and by God’s grace recovering in a rehab facility. I hope you take a moment and read his heartfelt words to his younger self and his promise to Jesus, his Savior, to finish his life well in Christ’s service.
Dear younger me
I did not see,
What my whole life
Was meant to be.
All the heartache
All the pain,
The guilt and hurt
And all the shame.
The things I did were all in vain,
All wasted now yet I remain.
So I can see my purpose now,
To You Lord Jesus I will bow.
Now I see what I’m to do;
Just follow You, only You.
You will lead me down a path,
Help me to forget my past.
I will tell them of Your love,
And of forgiveness from above.
Thank You Lord for saving me,
What You have done to make me free.
Your true love and sacrifice
Has given me a better life.
Kevin Long
The Key to Solid Recovery
Don’t think I come up with everything I write about regarding recovery from drinking and drug use Much of what I post comes from what I hear from successful people in recovery meetings. I also ask God’s help to express thoughts to the reader. The purpose of this post is the latter statement, God’s help.. Time after time I have heard the recovering admit that praying to God was key to their recovery. I totally agree.
The issues of addiction to drug and alcohol are regarded as a spiritual malady. Don’t doubt that for a second. even if you do not believe in God, or agnostic. I have witnessed several who had no spiritual belief remain clean and sober as they followed THE program. Yet those who rely on God through prayer have much stronger recovery, my personal observation. If our addictions are indeed a spiritual malady, the remedy must come from the spiritual plane. We could not use physical to fix the spiritual no more than putting a set of wings on one’s back would cause one to soar among the clouds, defying the physical law of gravity.
Simply put, physical laws cannot alter the dimension of the spirit. However, spiritual law can, and has, altered the physical and mental realms. This isn’t arguable in this reality we dwell in, and only realized by having faith in such. With that in mind, the practice of daily prayer to God for help to remain clean and sober is the key to solid recovery, and much more. As individuals follow what has worked for millions in AA, praying for God’s intervention to help just today a clean and sober day, their faith in His reality grows. They find God loving and ready to help them though at first, praying seems foolish, a waste of time. With days passing, their faith grows to ask for His help for other issues, until prayer develops into dialog, a relationship.
I have been asked about what God’s will is by several over the years. Why I was asked in most cases was I had been the individuals sponsor, not from having been in seminary. Sometimes I answer that with a question….”do you know what God’s will isn’t?”
The answer to that is that they do not use drugs or alcohol. That’s a given. Also, I believe God’s will is obvious to the one asking…He wants you free of addiction, He wants you changed entirely, body, soul, and spirit. That normally means, everything about the individual needs to change. Recovery from addiction programs are programs of “self reduction to others minded.” You may enter a rock star, but aspire to be a servant. (God’s will leads to real life in spite of how that may sound to your ears).
In truth, most that want to know God’s will having underlying reasons. In most cases, the hope of side-stepping consequences, or wanting to have someone agree with what they think. Others really want to know what I feel God wants them to do. That may cover many things, relationships, how to work their recovery out when opposed by family or friends, or for a desire to know God. For me, I find answers in scripture first of all. One particular place I look is in the “poetry sections,” Psalms, Ecclesiastes, mainly the book of Proverbs. These books are crammed with workable, godly advice like an atlas insert for my personal locality.
To be honest, I still hit walls often. though I look for spiritual answers through prayer and Bible readings, that doesn’t make me a spiritual know-it-all. Example being that I was absolutely sure a my last relationship was God’s will. For me, God had to be my priority in life in. Second, I knew whatever I wanted must come second to my mate’s needs and desires. Right priorities make perfect relationships…right? Not even close. The other individual has a say too. They may agree verbally, but hold to different priorities. If so, that does not mean the relationship is wrong or doomed to fail. But it may require more effort by both.
Though we agreed at the onset, and marital bliss seemed unending, vigilance was required daily. Even though I prayed before, even had solid counsel throughout, it ended badly. God, how did I miss Your will? That way of thinking can devastate one’s recovery if help is not immediately sought. My expectations, God’s will, her will, and enemy attacks, etc., all converged to where I could not see God’s will at all.
In retrospect, I remembered I had a check inwardly, but disregarded it thinking, “get behind me devil!” (Only comical now). God wanted to keep me from trouble, but my desire for a relationship held sway over waiting for His perfection. Ouch! I don’t know what hurt worse, the broken relationship, or being wrong at this stage of spiritual recovery, or…at my age.
In conclusion, pray for God’s help as a daily priority. This is the priority for solid recovery. Do meetings, get a sponsor that isn’t so cool but has a real spiritual side, do what you hear the successful in recovery have done. If you miss God’s will for whatever reason, He isn’t mad, ask Him again and talk to your sponsor about it.
Sure Recovery
Every meeting I attend has changed of late. It is not the structure, the topics, nor the methods that have changed. It is me. So many that attended have lost their lives to either returning to their misery, or have passed away from sickness of some sort. Each meeting gives me pause to wonder who may not make the next meeting. That is not in my control. No matter how I feel, my sure recovery requires me to suit up, show up, give what I have been given. This is my reality from attendance to meetings. There I learned I cannot fix anyone. I can only trust God, serve others, and keep my side of the street clean.
My struggle to meetings does not matter as long as I continue on, in disregard of my personal feelings and misgivings. Sure, recovery for me is based on the understanding I have of self-forgetfulness. How I feel, what I want, or what I think is not as important as what recovery meetings have etched in my thoughts….“meeting makers make it.” Without that understanding, in time, I would be back doing what landed me there in the first place. Thank God for His grace to understand my personal realities.
Many of you that read this are either in recovery, or are tearing through every site offering info on clean and sober living for a loved one’s sake. For the one looking for yourself, you are on your way to restored sanity and recovery. You want help and are looking for a way out. This is where recovery begins. Those looking for another, I can only tell you that “recovery is for those who want it, not for all who need it.” Not trying to bust your balloon, but they should be the one looking, not you. Don’t stop, by any means! As you go through page after page, you will learn how not to help them and enable their lifestyle.
Sure recovery is possible. I have known several, whose lives were like an elevator mechanic, up and down, sober, then drunk again. They eventually “came to believe” they could make it, and did! It is possible, they discovered, when their determination and desperation finally developed faith to believe their need to accept their plight, others help, and finally follow direction. By listening to others story and suggestions, the most important truth of recovery…God’s reality, His grace to help, mercy to forgive, and direction to change those hungry to be free.
“I know the thoughts I think about you, says The Lord, thoughts of peace, not of evil, to give you hope, and a future.” Jer. 29:11
“…casting all your care on Him, (God), for He cares for you.” 1 Pet.5:7
I have been through horrific problems lately. I know these problems would have crippled me without God’s indescribable grace that rests on my life through faith in Christ. These problems could add several paragraphs to this page. I will not honor them by giving them that space. That is not sure recovery at all.
Sure recovery is hope, turned into faith, turned into trust that when these problems pass, I will be able to look back and see God’s hand, pulling strings, and manipulating situations to bring me through. Victory is sure for me if I fight on, and credit Him, humbly acknowledging His will is done. Keep fighting, follow directions, get into meetings until they get into you.
God’s peace to all.
5 Things to Help Your Recovery
Being around the recovering crowd can be difficult at times. Mainly because most topics used for discussion, are often a moaning session. For obvious reasons, as you may guess. If someone happens to say something positive, the whole room may go silent from shock. The groups aren’t used to that. If they say too many positive words, it has an adverse effect, they think the individual is a lunatic.
I understand, as do all who attend meetings of recovery, that it is tough to stay positive with the many consequences we have to eventually deal with. But if we are bent on freedom from the sickness that enslaves us, we listen to what works, take it to heart, and do what it takes no matter how hard or how long. The positive may be elusive at first. But a little effort can produce positive results leading to the freedom desired.
Here are some simple suggestions to help you in recovery. These are not written in recovery literature, per se, but will help when used in collaboration with such.
1. Read, just a little, but read. This may be the most difficult for most in recovery. I have an idea as to why, but that idea is an entire essay. Many people here in the USA have little gratitude for the gift of reading. They state how they hate to read. Globally, illiteracy is staggering. People do not have any education because there is none available.They would give all they have to be able to read. Some are in areas of the world that suppress education. Here, in the US, we have the opportunity and the ability, but “just say no” to reading. Read anyway. Start with a small paragraph and build from there. Oh yeah, read recovery literature, not a romance novel.
2. Exercise. I know, I’m 0 for 2 in likable things to do to help your recovery. There again, do just a little. Merely getting up and walking to the mailbox, or down to the corner and back. Get your blood flowing and your mind works better. You can get positive results in a short time.
3. Change the station(s). Something I noticed from myself and reinforced by statements in meetings is; songs, TV shows, gaming, and movies, may have a dramatic effect on the addicted, to trigger a relapse. Especially, the music you listened to when using. Nobody likes silence, but try music you find tasteful, or tolerable. Try games to exercise your brain, documentaries on the tube, and movies…skip. All of these aren’t permanent changes, maybe they should be. But for a time early in returning from a relapse or new to recovery, try this.
4. A short inventory. This is not listing a 4th step, nor doing the 5th with your sponsor. This is a list, or maybe a name of someone you carry a resentment for, you cannot seem to forgive, or you need to ask forgiveness for a wrong. Take the name, or names, and pretend you are with them, and practice what you need to say to them. If that is uncomfortable, write them a letter expressing how you feel. Don’t hold back…let er’ rip! Do it again but pretend God, (Jesus), is there mediating the event. This may be a game changer to some who may be talking to awol parents, spouses, the officer or judge that sentenced them.
5. Fix your language. Really, seriously, start talking like an adult. You are wanting to recover from your addiction, right? Recover from your gangsta way of talking. Can you? F-bombs fly out in meetings and have become the accepted way to talk, some say. But if you are sitting in an interview for your dream job, I am sure you won’t use foul language in that meeting, will you?
It isn’t that your way of talking made you an addict, but that was the way you talked when you were using and boozing. Change that, bring dignity and honor to your life for being different. People will notice.
Give these thoughts a shot along with meeting attendance, daily prayer, service work, the steps with your sponsor. You may be the positive lunatic in the meeting, or the one who brings some shock and awe to the group where you attend. Just do it.
“Wise people store up knowledge, but the mouth of the fool invites ruin.” Prov. 10:14
Leading the Drunk to Water
More than likely, you have heard the saying, “you can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make it drink.” No matter how many times I have heard the adage, and have used it, I sometimes think that I can make it happen. Not the saying above, rather the message of leading others to a life, clean and sober, of following Christ, and serving others selflessly, I try to convince with conviction.
What makes me think I somehow am the measure of what is the right? I am not. What I do know has merit from experience, study, and spiritual practice. What I have experienced isn’t what brings others into a life of sober living, nor convinces an unbeliever to see Jesus as the Savior of the world. It is not my job to argue with others in AA or NA meetings that they have a distorted view of God, when they say something completely unholy regarding Him the way I personally know Him to be. I do not have a degree that makes me a word cop. I also must remember, who’s talking, where they are in recovery, and where they came from in life.
It happened again in a small meeting a couple of nights ago. A man I felt was highly educated, and certainly has a dynamic message of his coming into recovery, with the help of, and by the grace of God, made some false statements regarding the Bible. I didn’t oppose him in the meeting, but tried to “kindly” correct him afterwards. No argument ensued, but neither did I convince him of his error, and the ripple effect on others hearing him tumbling into total disbelief because of his blunder. The reason for no argument…God, I’m sure. To argue with him could kill any future opportunities with the thirsty, wanting to find the water hole.
“The main reason people in recovery do not grasp the message, is they don’t reach for it.” Author
AA’s Big Book warns members not to play the evangelist to those still actively drinking. Doing so may hinder any chance of helping those you are targeting to share your new life with. I believe that goes for attempts to exhort others in the program to drink deeper, raise their standards of behavior to a greater height around all of those watching them in their recovery.
In other words, maturing in their sobriety, become a real example. That’s change, what we hate the most. Fear of losing friends in recovery is at risk to the ones bold enough to accept and change. Sadly, most get just enough water to make them not want to drink, (booze or use dope). That is, the water being God, and the grace He bestows that leads them to recovery. There is more.
What should I do or say to get the horse to keep drinking? Talk and pray. God didn’t ask me to be His personal sheriff in recovery. If I trust Him, I say what He gives me to say in meetings, or to sponsor-ees, and nothing more. For those spreading a distorted view of God, I am to do two, no, three things: say nothing, love them, and pray God will enlighten them, bringing them into a deeper understanding of the incomprehensible power He has to change lives those no one imagined could ever change.
The warning to me, and to you if you are viewed as a leader in recovery, perplexed by what you hear in meetings, If we truly trust God to use what we give, do not forget His purpose in us is not to judge, but to serve. We only correct, or redirect if asked for help. If I try to play the know-it-all, and believe me, I know little, (that isn’t false humility, I learn as I go, how little I know), I will ruin any chance of influencing others to follow me to the streams of Living Water, the main Message of man’s existence, and living above addictions with God’s help.
Coming Clean 